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  • John James Johnson

I Fucking Hate This Job

Since lockdown began I have been taking on virtual etities as new clients to style. I do miss real clothes bad, the feel, the realness, but I gotta make a living. But its really starting to drain me. Like the last few weeks right, the only clients I've had are not flexible in what they want in the slightest, just boring boys. Why do they not know that I know what looks better and what's gonna make them happier? like what's wrong with having some fun with outfits man!! but anyway this is all childs play compared to my latest request.

This is Liam. White trash came up to me looking like he'd been wearing the same clothes since lockdown started. He smelt like it too to be honest. To start with that camp print is awful and the jacket doesn't fit you right. Slip on shoes? really? laces too difficult with opposable thumbs? Im gonna come right out and say it, you need a haircut, and the beard (if we can really call it that) is not working for you. And I really don't think I have the energy to go on anymore. Basically I can't help you. You're too much work its overwhelming and I'm not even sure the results would be worth it. Besides this is my first impression and they're meant to count right.

But anyway is not like I can say any of that to his face so I just hit him with the "I am so sorry I am super busy right now so am not taking on any new clients", it not like he'll ever find out its bullshit, this is all top secret with password security.

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